Many ppl dont work .. but atleast they have jobs !!

While tiring my eyes with viewing the screen and my hands with typing those short chat messages, I wondered about what a job is. Well, I certainly was doing something in office, and I almost certainly will get a salary at the end of the month. Increments remain a doubtful issue, but so is it for most of you people.
Being full of work ethics, I access only limited sites from office. Gmail and gtalk are perhaps the most ethical of places that you can go on the net. Its also our daily dose of foul mouthing ( this is a mild term). When a friend has sent a mail to the NBMS (our MBA group) , it ought to be treated with utmost respect and responded to within a time frame that can challenge the gunshot. Its a norm, a way of life .. you cant just by pass traditions. So, I uphold it. The topics may start with "Why Jinnah is Secular" but it almost certainly will end up at parts of our bodies being described in the most secular manner possible. I cant deny my active participation in the great Indian social bonding. This fits my value systems, my traditions and more importantly my office timings. This is one job I do. Its like Kaizan !! You need to continuously keep yourself updated or someone else would have out abused you.
I keep myself busy with the simultaneous chatting. This is a unbelievable modern day gift to us. We who travel spaces, build dams, make holes in the mountains, mend a river have also created IM. We tell people how we feel by our status messages and try to keep it to a certain level of curiosity. We want and we need people to ping us and ask "Wot?". We do it to friends lest they should think we don't care and even worse, they might not ask us "Wot?". We also try and ensure that there are atleast 2 chat windows. Some people call it diversification of risks, some call it hedging, some call it greater width of distribution. I don't call it anything because of lack of vocabulary. And this i must confess has been my favourite job of late.
Its sad that I have given up smoking (well..almost). This was one thing that kept me busy for a while and also increased my circle of influence. Its one way of ensuring that the earth doesn't bulge under the pressure of human population.( Not only my weight but also the weight of my "circle of influence". )In fact the ecologists should promote it. The discussions could range from how a Mr XYZ sucks while Mr ABC actually sucks his boss's d****. In the process I also discovered that those who do what Mr ABC does, should take care of the fact that STD spreads through oral sex as well. Thanks to my great socialising skills the Manager of my next door company told me that and he works for Durex. Coming back to the topic of smoking, from office politics to national politics, from personal issues to national issues, from why I should quit the company to why even the president should (I, of course am too good for my job and he is incompetent) - all of them over a few drags is not a bad deal.
Inspite of all my respect for IPR and piracy laws, I download movies. Torrents have been of great help. The process goes like this - Step 1 . Ask someone/IMDB about a movie. Step 2. Get a torrent. Step 3. Tell a friend out of Patna that it is a movie worth watching, motivate him enough to download the stuff. Step 4. Attempt downloading the movie for like a week. Step 5. Copy the movie from the friend. Job well done.
Did I forget something ? Oh yes .. I do sometimes check my boss's mails and utter things like crap, bull.... and call my sales staff to say how to do things that even I dont know. Being an MBA helps. Not because I know a lot of things, but because people think that I do.
Did I mention that I work ?? Nope .. but I do a lot of jobs ...